What to pay attention to so that the child does not grow up as a dependent adult? Pay close attention to your own behavior, not your child's, as it is you who form maladaptive coping strategies (how a person copes with stress and adapts to a changing environment). Why do you have such an inept child, you ask, the correct answer is closest to the fact that you run around him like an electric broom. From the book of one famous psychologist Petranovskaya: "The psychologist left the parent and the preschool child alone in a room where there are a lot of interesting things - toys, manuals. The actions of each couple were recorded on a video camera, and as a result, four groups of parents were obtained. The first group of parents forbade children to get up, walk around the room and touch other people's things. In the second group, the parents themselves brought the child to toys, aids, offered them games or activities. Parents from the third group sat and silently watched as the children explored the environment. In the last group, the parents themselves enthusiastically played, examined, studied things and did not involve the child in this process in any way. Psychologists watched children for some time after this experiment, and it turned out that children develop best with parents from the fourth and third groups (parents who do not pay active attention to the child), and worse - with parents from the first and second. At the same time, in the first group, the results were even slightly better than in the second, because while sitting, the child can at least consider what he wants."